Don’t fruit the beer! Man law!
A few years back, there was a rather amusing series of commercials for Miller Lite in which athletes, actors, and others sat around a table discussing various questions about manhood such as whether it’s permissible to put lime in one’s beer, share an umbrella with another man, use a fake fire log, and so on. The answer, predictably, was a firm No: Real men do things in the least comfortable, least technology-intensive means possible.
I was reminded of these commercials recently when reading the reactions to my James Bond Ruined the Martini post. Real men don’t drink vodka! Real men drink my brand of gin! Real men drink whiskey!
Look, Burt Reynolds is unquestionably a manly man. He was a star halfback at Florida State before tearing up his knee and went on to become one of the biggest leading men in Hollywood history, playing macho roles in flicks ranging from “Deliverance” to “Smoky and the Bandit” and “Cannonball Run.” When he got older, he reinvented himself — much like John Wayne — into a guy willing to make fun of himself in movies like “Strip Tease” and “Boogie Nights.” He’s been “romantically involved” with the likes of Adrienne Barbeau, Loni Anderson, Sally Field, Dolly Parton, and Chris Evert.
But, frankly, if you’re touting Miller Lite, your opinion on beer is not something I much value. And a lime goes great with a Corona (which is damned near undrinkable otherwise) and other citrus fruits are good with some wheat beers.
One of the points of Manzine is for men to share with other men things we’ve learned the hard way over the years. Life’s too short to drink crappy beer, eat overdone steaks, have lousy scotch, or deny yourself the joys of the mojito or a proper martini until you discover them in your 40s.
But, hey, some people really like Miller Lite and come back to it after trying dozens of Belgian ales. Or they can’t afford more expensive beer. And that’s fine.
Similarly, if you prefer wine spritzers to a robust cab, a banana daiquiri to a single malt scotch, vodka to gin, or quiche to ribeye, that’s fine by me.
There are ways of getting you man card revoked. None of them involve what kind of beer you drink.
Photo by Flickr user CC Chapman under Creative Commons license.